you were not caged as perceived
a wondering and gliding spirit
merely attracted to the like
a connection which passes current understanding
the cage was never closed
in fact, there is no cage
you must completely open your heart before you can see
the short term future is still unknown, little bird
the long term was determined long ago
everything will return
Posted by Peter Owen | Filed under Personal
Have you ever
just stopped and asked yourself “Wait… what the fuck am I doing?!”
just turned someone off in your life like a switch?
realized over a quarter century has whizzed past and have no idea what you’re doing?
realized that you don’t know what your purpose in life is?
admired other people for making changes that appear good for their soul?
been aware of your potential yet have no idea how to reach it?
wanted to go cliff diving?
wanted to go white water rafting?
wanted to go out west again?
wanted to excel at disc golf?
felt your self worth questioned by someone you love?
wanted to meet people like you, but just can’t seem to place your finger on how or where?
not known how to express yourself?
been numb to your feelings?
Last Saturday, we drove down to Nesbit, MS to Nesbit Blueberry Plantation. Diana and I had been wanting to do this for a while and it’s a good thing we did last weekend. Nesbit Blueberry Plantation is only going to stay open for the season another couple of weeks. None of us have ever picked fruit like that before. They had us tie buckets around our waists so we could pick using both hands. They also encourage you to eat the blueberries right off the bush. Elek had a wonderful time doing just that. They only cost about $11 per bucket full. The blueberries were just delicious!
This is a poem I wrote many years ago.
How do you know when you see someone’s soul?
When it peaks from behind their eyes
Feel it penetrate your every defense
Touching your heart at the core
Words don’t need to be said
Your heart starts at every movement
Waiting for what could be real
For new developments
Like a child taking its first steps
Slowly into the unknown
This morning I was reminded of what Diana and I will eventually have to do as Elek grows up. We’ll need to take steps slowly and cautiously to let Elek experience the world for himself. This is hard for many parents and understandably so. So back to this morning.
I was driving home, down our street from dropping Elek off at daycare and I saw four boys that were clearly walking to Peabody school which was about 2 blocks away. One of them was crying with his jacket pulled part way down. One was next to him comforting him by putting his arm around him. Another was close and then there was the ever-present straggler bring up the rear. I thought to myself “What in the world are they doing? Why is he crying?” Then a few seconds later I saw a woman hiding behind a car and tree watching these boys walk to school. I imagine that’s his mother making sure he got there safe.
Sometimes as children we’re not ready to be independent, but the time has come. That must be really hard for that mother to watch her son walking off slowly, crying. But she knows as do I that once her son has done it a couple times it will be like second nature to him. I suppose sometimes we all need a push out of the nest of comfort.
The other night was Elek’s first actual sleepover. We hosted Jesse from across the street. Elek happened to be in a phase where he really wanted to misbehave. Other than that, the sleepover went great.
That Friday night, the boys are edamame among other things and drank their milk. They loved playing in the ball pit that Elek got for his birthday from Nana. Elek and Jesse watched a show or two and Elek climbed the couch. Lastly, they took turns pushing each other down a small slide. They were so funny together! Jesse stayed the next day (Sat.) until around 2PM and the McRaes came and got him to keep him for the rest of the weekend.